Break Free

My thoughts today have hardly anything to do with running. Even though I'm certain there are pieces that can be extracted and tied into it, pointing to what thoughts linger in the recesses of my brain, but I'll leave that for you to either apply or dismiss to your own efforts.

So, this morning, Aaron and I were in our garden because I requested his help untangling and wrangling our tomato plants. I have that problem every year when there's a sudden tomato vine growth spurt, and everything goes higgly piggly. After more than a decade of this, you would think I would come up with a preventative measure for this problem. But, I digress ...

My little garden gnome...

Okay, so I knew what I needed, and I had the supplies to do so. But, I most definitely needed Aaron's height to make the job go faster as he can reach to the roof eave without a ladder, and I most certainly cannot. That part of the process is always easy as our jobs are very clearly defined: You're tall, so, do the tall stuff. Easy.

The attention required toward the vines near the ground is also generally easy because I just get down to business and do it myself. Today, after surveying the situation, Aaron had a really good idea, and I could totally picture the outcome of what he intended. It was the in between part that brings me to the real reason of today's story ...

I think one of the most difficult lessons for we humans to learn (and master ... gulp ...) is that there is more than one way to accomplish something. (I'd say that whole "there's more than one way to skin a cat" thing, but it grosses me out. And, my cats don't appreciate the sentiment.) It's even more difficult to accept that not only is there more than one way, but it's also very possible-if-not-probable that our way isn't necessarily the better way, it's just different. And, I had to remind myself of this over and over and over as I watched Aaron approach the tomato situation.

I am not ashamed to admit that, at the onset while he was untangling the mess of vines, I had a few thoughts, "He's totally doing it wrong and is going to break all of the vines" in my head. I would be completely ashamed if I had to admit that I never got over it and micromanaged him right out of the garden (it's like I've done it before ...).

It was at that moment when I kept my mouth shut and my brain on that I realized I'd actually grown enough to not insist (or flip out) when the process wasn't what I envisioned. I then realized I'm really good about supporting outcomes in one of two scenarios: I didn't have to be a part of the process, therefore, all I see is the measurable outcome, OR the process went in a way that makes sense to me, so, the outcome is predictably good. It's when the path to get there makes me somehow uncomfortable that the end game is nothing to be jazzed about because I'm all wound up from the process. (It's that whole cat thing that I tended to ignore because it's so gross.)

As Aaron worked with the unruly tomato vines, I decided to tell myself the following, in this order: "(a) He likes tomatoes way more than I, so of course he's going to take care of the plants; (b) he can do it, or I'm going to have to, so who really cares how it happens as long as it happens, and (c) if I distract myself by pulling weeds, I'll eventually have the tomatoes taken care of and a spot that has no weeds. Oh, and I won't have said something bossy and stupid in the process."

So, I pulled weeds. And, our tomato plants are in grand shape complete with a makeshift hammock for their resting pleasure. Our harvest promises to be bountiful, and the rest of our day had a sunny outlook because I chose not to be a bitch micromanager and open my mind up to there being more than one way to do something successfully.

Isn't it that locked-down mindset that often gets in our own way? I know it did for me and running*. It was a major roadblock, pun intended, when I started because I figured there was a prescribed way to "be" or how to run (especially with regard to speed and what was "acceptable"). I was totally on board with what it "meant" to be a runner, and as long as I held on to that, then I wasn't one of them. But, that measurable end wasn't a productive one for me.

We all know I choose not to ascribe to any way of running than my own way. And, that is why it has worked for so long.

* Apparently, I also chose not to ascribe to my own introduction where I said I had no inclination to tie today's lesson into running. See what I did there? I broke my own directive. I can't help it because my brain is perpetually in motion thinking new thoughts.

What's stuck in your head that is keeping you from doing something you want to do or is otherwise holding you back? It's worth stepping back for a moment and giving it some thought. Maybe there's nothing. But, being a human, I'm betting there's something ...

With that, we round out Sunday and look forward to the week ahead! Monday starts out with a run for me, so I'll be checking in after!