Oh, Monday ...

It's Monday, everyone, so I thought I'd start the day off with a little quiz! Which of the following did I grab right after running this morning:

Your choices are (A) the Diet Coke in the middle or (B) the
bottle of water on the right.

The answer in a minute as I have some critters to show you. No, not running road kill, I don't take pictures of grody stuff. You see, it was raining earlier this morning (frankly, all night long), so my brain had already shifted to putting my miles in on the treadmill. While running today's 4 is stinky on the mean machine, I counted my blessings that I avoided the forecasted rain this weekend allowing that long run outside! I'll trade 4 inside for 10 outside any day!

By the time I was ready to run, I noticed it was barely sprinkling. I took a step outside to see what was really going on, and I found out I was being joined by a new friend:

I have no clue as to what he was doing, but he was having fun.

Then he saw me and got, well, squirrelly!

At this point, the new friend didn't know it was being stalked by the fierce kitty:

Lizzy worked hard to intimidate the squirrel. It didn't work, but
she worked hard trying! Isn't that what counts sometimes?!

All the while, Elly could not have cared less about the happenings on the deck. She was trying to be patient while hopeful that she would get to join me for a jaunt:

"This is not looking good ... this is not looking good ..."

Everything worked against Elly's hopes today, though. It was only sprinkling, but I'd also already decided that I could get the laundry started while being on the treadmill and I had some shows recorded that I'd now have an opportunity to watch. Oh, and can I just tell you what wet roads do to the underside of a trotting pooch? I wasn't really in the mood for the post-run towel rub down she would require ... the one that never gets her very dry anyway.

What pushed my decision over the edge was that moment of standing still, listening and wondering, "Was that just thunder? I don't think it was, but I'm not sure. Wait! Was that? Or, was that a truck?" To quote Charlie Brown: "Arrrrgh!!" Enough is enough! I gave Elly some behind-the-ear scratches and headed to the mean machine!

I'm here to report that while I did get a jump start on the laundry, the shows I recorded were terrible, so the tv distractor was not up to par today! I just hate the treadmill, I really, really do. But, you know, the feeling I get on it isn't all that different from the one I get when I hit somewhere around mile 7 with more to go, so I did embrace the mental training it provided me today. That's worth quite a bit whether I enjoy it or not! I'm banking that in my Half marathon decision-making meter!

So, I finished, deleted my recordings and headed outside (where it had stopped raining altogether, of course !) to enjoy my post-run beverage:

If you chose B, you were correct! I used to
really not like drinking water at all. Running
has not only made me appreciate its value,
but it also tastes oh-so-yummy when I'm
oh-so-hot-and-gross!

My new friend was out there again, too (driving Lizzy crazy inside!):

It's pretty appropriate that today was a treadmill day. It's a Monday after all, so why not punctuate that groove with treadmillin'? The miles are logged no matter what, though, so I call it good! It's off to get that Diet Coke and get to work. Tomorrow, I'll see you from the kitchen ... JUST WAIT 'til you see the most recent scrumptious addition to our dinner repertoire!!

Post-Run Humor

Want to see something funny? Yesterday at Kohl's, we saw this...:

... and, we saw this:

They're both t-shirts. They were perfect for a little post-run humor!

What do they have to do with running? Really, not much except (1) the fact that I was not only standing but also  casually shopping after such a run was very notable as compared to past comparable runs, and (2) angry Woodstock looks much how I feel when I am tired and running. It's just true. I'm very seriously considering getting it for my next Half Marathon ... It's like a warning to others around me; if my face doesn't give it away, perhaps the shirt will tell the tale ...

Most important, though, these shirts made us laugh out loud, and you can't ask for much more than that on any day let alone today's Rest Day (ahh ... much appreciated today!)! See you tomorrow after the morning run!

Sometimes, Indecision Works For Me!

Good day, sunshine!

Hello, 6:30 a.m. sun ... I don't tend to see you ...

I think "Good day, sunshine!" every time I head out for an early morning run when I first see the sun, but I can't stand the song of the same name ... makes for a challenge in my head to over-write the lyrics and push 'em out. Today's song bringing on success? "Pour Some Sugar On Me." Thank you, Def Leppard ...

See the issues I sometimes have running? It's a tricky little sport sometimes, I'm telling you.

It's trickier still when I intended to make this run the one to decide whether or not to register for the upcoming Half Marathon opportunity, and the end of the story is: Still No Decision! Here's how it unfolded:

I knew just the route I wanted to use for these 10 miles; it has promise of good scenery and is challenging without killing myself. Then, late last night, I had the brainstorm to run it backward (not literally, that would make me fall down). I decided to flip it "just because." What I didn't really think through was how many of the hills are strategically in good places going one direction, but they're more than a nuisance going the other. Whoopsie. But, the upcoming Half course is very challenging, so, in truth, this on-a-whim decision probably served me very well.

Okay, so I totally cruised the first three miles without issue. At that point, I reminded myself of when that wasn't even possible. So, mini celebration for me, and I continued on my way. Then, mile 4 provided me with some fun!

These two cracked me up. The one in the back kept honking
all the way across the street. I found that very smart. Cars do,
why not geese in the road? (By the way, that little hill? Ouch!)

And, there's our friend Mallard. I was hoping to see him today!

For this route, I go up and around this street, then I turn around to hit it again. Boy, was I rewarded for the turn around! Look!

Just when I thought this was the same pair as before, I noticed
the original couple on my right. These on the left had a family!

Honking all the way across. Bravo for safety! (I think I enjoyed
this more than those in the cars stopped going both ways!)

How cute is that? My favorite is all the way over to the left.
The one with his head under water. I know there's one in the
middle with his head under, but the one on the left is just
going for it!

I was able to get close enough to only be hissed at but not so
close either adult wanted to attack. I can't imagine how much
it would blow to get attacked by a goose. That would probably
make my running-this-Half decision easier, though ... What a
great reason. "Well, you see, I was attacked by a goose ... no,
really, I was ..."

This kind of thing totally reinvigorates me! (Seeing the babies, not the thought of goose attacks)Maybe it's because it's just so darned cool, or maybe it's because I stopped running for a minute! Either way, how totally fun to have this happen along the way!

Full of viewing pleasure and flush with cash after finding a dime on this stretch, I started back up realizing I really did need to keep on keepin' on if I was going to finish any time soon! Onward I went, and I even saw my friend out running! You know the one ... the one I saw back in March, and when I stopped to say "hi" I slipped off a curb. Nice! No stopping today! We kept it at waving today!

Soon after all of the goodness, I started to feel it coming. My legs were clearly getting tired, and I immediately started to wonder if I was doing the right thing considering this upcoming Half. I could just feel the uncertainty hitting me. It wasn't so much that I was doubting myself, it was really just a matter of figuring out if I was genuinely physically ready to take on another Half so soon. Keeping in mind my main priority is to not hurt myself, I take this question really seriously.

The thing is, making that decision right in the moment -- the first moment -- I felt uncertain is a big mistake. If I stopped every time I felt uncertain or even felt tired, I'd never keep going. Right when I passed mile 6, I had an opportunity to regroup. It was there where I could turn right and keep on the route I'd mapped, or I could turn left and get home faster. Turning left would also seal the deal that the upcoming Half is not a possibility as I'd be messing too much with the training miles I use.

That way means I keep on going ... and
there's a hill I hate over there. Yowza...

But, I'm not going to know if I don't try ...
darn it all!!!

So, I took off going right (onward with the plan!). After about 10 steps, I stopped. I turned around with every intention of heading home when I stopped at the same corner, turned around again, and continued on with the planned route. I just couldn't see making this decision in the moment. I'm not that impulsive in my life in general (take that impulse-at-the-counter buys!), so why start now?

Just around the corner of mile 6 is a steep incline, and I chose to walk up it. It was here my calves started aching (in that we're-warning-you  way ... I've learned what to listen to and what I can work through, and my calves are not only pretty bossy, but they make me pay when I don't listen!), so a little walk was both refreshing and required. I spent that time working to switch my brain from decision-making mode to rethinking mode. The moral of rethinking mode is that I remembered I originally wanted two long runs behind me before deciding about this Half option. Not one. Two. I still have time for another to truly evaluate how things are cranking.

Sticking with the original, thought-out strategy seemed the most wise of all options. And, I felt great about it!

This run then shifted to a just-finish situation, and that was just fine! In truth, I was still having a good time so why ruin it with the pressure?! I was, though, getting hot, my calves traded cramp warnings with my toes (oh, yeah ... that's an awesome sensation! And, not at all painful when going up a hill! Thanks, toes!), and  I ran out of water!

Didn't I just pass a gas station where I could have filled this?!
Yeah, I think I did! Great planning! Grrrr ...

I also ran out of giving a hoot if I was walking or running, so I rested my grouchy muscles and walked a stretch. There was a day I would have berated myself for doing so. Today, not at all!

Thumbs up to the walk break and just moving on!!

I alternated running and walking for the last mile, and my toes in particular thanked me for it. And, look what I came across on the way:

I've seen all kinds of mess on the road, much of which seems
to be the aftermath of late-night weekend munchies. I'd love to
know just who thought fish sticks would do the trick ...

Upon my arrival home, the entire Pit Crew was right inside. I said hello but didn't smile because I was pretty whipped. Aaron asked, "How'd it go?!" to which I replied, "It hurt!" and I kept going toward the water! I heard PC#3 ask, "How far did she go?" Aaron told her which is when I heard PC#3 give a low "Woahhh" grunt. To be honest, that understanding is a little validating after a tough one!

So, there's no official decision about the Half Marathon, and that's all good! I know I need that next long run. I also noticed my time when I returned home today, and it ended up taking me only 7 minutes longer than planned to finish these miles even after walk breaks and let's-ponder-this breaks and birdie breaks. That indicates to me this is totally doable, I just have to get really clear on what I'm wanting to accomplish and what I want to give to get it! That's a great spot to be in -- yet again, I get to determine the outcome. I am totally the boss of my running!

In the meantime, I share with you my super scores of the day ...:

Two rounds of silver bling ... ba-da-bing!

... and two of the reasons my current decision will ultimately be pretty easy to make because I know it will be supported no matter what:

"We'll support whatever you decide, Mom! Right now, we're
just glad that you smell better than you did an hour ago!"

Tomorrow's Rest Day! That rules! I have fun stuff to show you, so I'll see you then!

It's a Special Day!!

You've seen her all over this blog because she's completely  fabulous!

Today, we celebrate Elly!! It's her 5th birthday!!!

I owe a lot to this sweet girl!!

I don't think I would have started running without having her.
I know I wouldn't have kept going if not for her.
I have a pace I can rely on because I adopted hers.
I have learned from her that just having fun is enough.
I have followed her "Keep going 'til we're finished and no need to complain about it" lead.
I have learned from her that you stop when you need then get back to it. No biggie.
And, running or not, there's a whole piece of my heart filled with love because of her.

We are so blessed to have her!! Happy Birthday, Sweet Elly!!!

Stewing

Hey, remember these?!

Mmm ... chicken quesadillas featuring Hungry Girl-recommended
La Tortilla Factory Smart & Delicious tortillas ... mmm ...

And, then there's this new favorite in the household:

Double-mmm ... tofu dip ... can't stop saying mmmm ...

All I can say is PUT THESE TWO TOGETHER and you will have a dance party on your palate!! This is what we made for dinner last night ... I spread a little of the tofu dip on the quesadillas (to help things stay in place before they were cooked), and we each had a helping on the side to dip our quesadillas. I knew it would be tasty, but was a smash!! Even PC3 demolished his serving and ... wait for it ... asked for more! Too bad we didn't have more, but it's the thought that counts!

This dinner was a nice way to wind down the evening. Too bad my morning didn't start off as well. The bottom line is sometimes you get involved in a project, you invest yourself and, no matter how much you put into it, it doesn't necessarily turn out the way you wanted. Even if the outcome isn't a bad one, it might not be what you pictured and desired. That was my morning before I ran. Very unfortunate. By the time I was able to run, believe that I didn't really feel like it. But, the calendar said otherwise, and off I went.

I admit I spent a great deal of today's run stewing. I was trying not to, but it was happening. I even had a grumbly stance when I was waiting for traffic lights, hand jammed in to my hip and all. But, that's also when I looked down and noticed how nicely my lightening shoe laces complimented today's running shirt:

Excellent coordination. Foul mood offset
by rockin' laces!!

Even though I spent more time than I really wanted to in my state of stew, I took the opportunity to remind myself of one of the reasons I enjoy running: I can just head out and go. No matter what I'm thinking about (or not), none of that matters in those moments. Those moments are about nothing more than putting one foot in front of the other from point A to point B. That's it. And, if nothing else goes the way I want it to on that day, the fact is I will have started and completed at least one thing. And, I will do it my way.

(It doesn't even have to be a "great" run to be a successful one. Success = Did it. Wahoo!!)

We don't tend to have the luxury to seize that kind of control of most activities (nor should we as we should be working together congizant of others involved). We also don't tend to have pockets of time that provide such freedom to just breathe. I'm super-social and very much enjoy being around people, but, I have to say when it comes to these solo stretches of time, I have come to look forward to them and thrive within them -- just me, my lightening shoelaces and some rogue pennies.

And, today, I did so with a butterfly that followed me around for a while!

It's there almost in the middle. Yellow, fabulous and a little
camera shy!

 See you tomorrow ... it's not just Rest Day, it's a super-special day!! Check it out tomorrow!

Big Picture

It was a big day for Elly as she joined me on her first 4-mile run since the Fall!! Hooray! You might recall that she presented me with the aftermath of her post-4 miler tummy troubles -- twice -- so, I sidelined her for runs more than 3 miles. It just seemed like the right thing to do. And, less gross.

But, months later, I had the itch to try her again. And, she (as always) had the itch to go!

"I am soooo ready to go, and I hear PC#3 getting a bread bag.
That has to be a good sign!!"

I am more than pleased to report the end of the story in that she did great! No post-run problems whatsoever! Hooray! In fact, instead of being all worked up afterward, she went exactly the opposite direction:

"I am exhausted. I don't think I'll move for the rest of the day."

"Wait ... I will actually move thiiiiiissss far ... Ahhh ..."

I understand why she was so zapped by the time we got home. Not only has she not been conditioned as of late for regular running, but it was considerably warmer this morning than it has been for a few days. The roller coaster temperatures in and of themselves make running a challege as every temperature has an impact, and you have to figure out how to manage whatever it does to you! Can't I just go out and run without it being complicated? (I guess not!)

I did pay closer attention to Elly given the temperature. My general guide is that I assume -- based on watching her in the past and how she's behaved -- the temperature feels about 10 degrees warmer to her than to me. So, if I'm warm, she's quite warm (if I'm hot, she's not with me), and that needs accommodation. By "accommodation" I mean, "slowing down."

Can I just say, "Fine by me!" It was nice to take it easy this morning and have a built-in excuse to do so! She slows me down anyway with all of her investigating and pit stopping ...

"So many smells! So many smells! This is awesome! And, the
grass pampers my paws! Win-win!"

 ... but, today, that was all okay with me. Besides, I got to check out the scenes myself:

These are everywhere right now! Fabulous!

Between Elly's multiple stops, my shoe coming untied, slowing down to investigate the possibility of finding a coin (which, today, turned out to be bird poo; always a disappointment) and having no issue waiting at intersections for cars to go, I have to say that there are many, many people who would define this outing as not a "real" run. I read about it, I hear about it on tv, I hear it amongst the super-fast and the super-competitive, "it" being what constitues a "real" or "true" run.

I respectfully disagree.

For those who want to hard-core compete, who want to win their events and who consistently strive for PRs with regard to time, you are correct in not identifying this outing as one that is going to train me to get to the finish line first. Or second. Or third! But, it's going to get me there, and I'm going to have fun along the way (except when Elly makes a deposit that I then have to carry two and a half miles to the nearest trash can ... yeah, I don't call that part fun).

I recently read a running blog where the author identified his training philosophy as working to make himself better today than he was yesterday (measured in minutes per mile). He's a competitive runner, and his philosophy makes sense. For him. And, truly, his history and achievements are impressive. It's neat to read about.

But, I took the liberty of reworking his philosophy and applying to myself. Not only did I not start running until I was 39, but I have consistently kept going. Therefore, I present The reworked philosophy: Every run today is better than I was for many yesterdays.

Frankly, running consistently without giving up on the effort was an original long-term goal of mine. Or, more accurately, it is a life-long goal. My eye is on that kind of prize, so whatever I do now is in support of what I'm very much wanting to do for decades. (I've said before that I just know I'll place in my age category when I'm in the 70+ group. I'm patient, I can wait!)

My life long goal is part of why, from the get-go, I looked way beyond how I'm doing in terms of time and focused on the whole experience. Granted, I'm not a speed demon anyway, but I knew I didn't have to let that defeat nor define me. There was more to all of this than that. And, my way really, really works for me.

Whatever you're taking on, embrace what it is that makes it yours and makes it important to you. Go ahead and define it yourself! And, be strong in the face of question and judgment. That will happen, but that's okay. It just means you're presenting something a little different. A little unique. A little unexpected. And, I say, a whole lot awesome!

Speaking of awesome, check out my pal:

How happy is that post-run pooch?!

Back at it tomorrow! See you then.

A Little Tweak = Perfection!

On this Rest Day, we're back in the kitchen tweaking my most recent yummy find in the form of tofu dip!! This is a quickie but a goodie!!

Here's the recipe if you need. This time, though, I did not put in any garlic at all, and I stuck with the bottled lemon juice. What I added, though, is simply devine ...

I wanted something zesty. So, Fiesta Ranch
it was! Put the whole package on in there ...

I originally thought I would only use a heaping spoonful of the
chopped green chilis ... but, I tasted it, and it wasn't enough. So:

In with the whole 4 oz. can! Mmm ... JUST RIGHT!

I blended 'til smooth ... and, WOW SO YUMMY! One of these weekends, it's going to be so fabulous on taco salad!!! I'm going to have to plan that taco salad, though, in that it comes my way on the eve of a Rest Day. (Is it weird that now that I run, I have to think of things like that? Pennies may abound on my routes, but potty stops don't. Just. Sayin'.)

I am so happy to have this new protein source in my world! So, I get a dip that's really a mouth full of protein! Super Score!! That's some good fuel for the morning run! See you after!

Here We Go Again!

Good day, sunshine!! It's back to the pavement today as Rest Week is over (boo!)! I am a little split on that, though ... the first few days of a Rest Week rock entirely, but, by the end, I do have a bit of an itch to get back to it. (I must be feverish ...) So, this morning, I laced up my shoes, and it really felt good! It kind of reminded me of when I used to tie my cleats before a soccer game. Somehow, just the act of putting on specific shoes for a specific function and tying them made me feel cool.

Now that I'm no longer that teen or 20-something taking the soccer field to task, I remind myself that trucking along at 43 after having started at 39 holds its own brand of cool! Keep that in mind whenever you are taking on a challenge ... it's not like we were when we were teenagers, and even though there are those around us who are probably doing what we're doing faster or whatever, we're still doing it. And, that counts for a lot!

Speaking of a cool factor, it was quite chilly out this morning! The temp was just right to create some fabulous dew which is oh-so pleasing to my pup! See?

Let's look from another angle, shall we?

I was so glad to restart the journey with Elly joining me today!! You might remember that she started exhibiting some tummy troubles post-4-milers, so, I stopped taking her on those-or-longer runs. I was stoked to realize my schedule started with a 3 today! I'm secretly pondering bringing her on Wednesday's 4, though. Shhh ... don't let her know yet ...

We had an unexpectedly great run!! This was, by far, the best back-to-it run I've had after either of the other Half runs. I think the main reason it was so good is because of how seriously I'm considering this upcoming Half, and, in doing so, I simply cannot let my brain come all the way down to my normal baseline. I have to maintain some mental momentum to keep the mileage higher in order to do this right (right = my pace, my way, not hurting myself). The day to decide is this weekend still, but today's run points toward all systems GO.

So, I either worked my mental game the right way to make this a great run OR it's because I found some coins!!

There's one penny, but I found another
one and a dime!! Yahoo!! More money
than miles, baby!

I'm not going to lie, finding a penny here and there on these runs actually makes a bit of a difference in my outlook! It's like a perpetual treasure hunt. How fun is that?

I learned something else today: You know how people say you should never go to the grocery store hungry because you'll impulse buy whatever looks tasty? First, I agree with that. Been there. But, my real point is I realized today that the very best thing I can do for myself and my family is to go grocery shopping right after I run! (It's probably not beneficial to those who have to stand in line by me, but ...) When I'm at the store after running, I crave the good stuff and find myself steering clear of things that aren't the best fuel. Don't get me wrong, my cart is not perfect, but it is so much better after a run! See?

Back off, cat, you don't even like produce ...

I probably look a bit happily frantic when I see how inexpensive the produce is at my friend Aldi, and if people around me haven't experienced my running fumes, then they might be concerned as I look as though I'm about to drool on the ol' oranges. (Fortunately, I can control that in a store ... but sometimes not when running! Ew, but true.)

And, now that I'm seeing those grapes and oranges, I'm off to indulge and carry on with the day! Take on your Monday knowing it's not about what others are doing ... it's about your successes!! Have at it, and I'll see you tomorrow!

Whoops: Nancy Math Didn't Add Up

I can't say I'm surprised that I screwed up my latest mathematical feat. I'm a bit yikes! about it, but I'm not surprised!

You see, I pulled down the ol' calendar today to start planning out running the next few weeks. In particular, I wanted to plot out what to do this week and next to see how up for the just-around-the-corner Half Marathon I am. For weeks, I thought my first long run post-Rest Week was going to be 9 miles. It turns out, it needs to be 10. See?

In case you need a closer look ... (I do because I'm a bit dazed from the reality bite):

Yup, that sure is a 10. For 10 miles. MAN! I was so focused on 9 ...

You'll also notice I put it all in pencil. I've never done that, but I'm trying to be realistic. If all goes well next Saturday with 10, it all goes in pen, I'll hand over my money to run (and obtain a what-color-have-I-been-complaining-about? shirt) and get the wheels in motion to take on another one!

I'm not going to lie, it feels a tiny bit overwhelming. But, this is the kind of thing that inspires me to push myself. I already know I can finish a Half within my own rules (timewise, how I feel after, can I get up early enough to train, blah blah ...). So, now I'm wondering if I really can take on another endurance run so soon.

Why would I want to? That's a good question and one for which I have a good answer because "Just because" doesn't really work for me. The bottom line is I originally considered taking it on in an effort to maintain the weekend long run momentum. It's a lot of work to build those miles to 13, and it feels weird to just let it slip away immediately once I cross the finish line! So, putting a requirement of an official event entry oughta do it ... at least until that run's over! (Ha!)

I may be completely looney, and I may fail miserably on this particular point. Or, it may be just fine. I may even totally surprise myself! I won't know unless I give it a shot, though, so off I go tomorrow to reboot! And, I'll be keeping this in mind:

I sure as heck have made up my mind to give it my all.
Thank you, Mary Engelbreit day-by-day calendar! 

And, thank you, Aaron, for completely and utterly believing in me. You're the best, Pit Crew leader. And, thank you for encouraging me to try even without the promise of post-race pizza :).

(For those of you who don't know the pizza promise, check out the shirts from September's Half):

They are worth soooo much more than the price of pizza!

See you after the morning run ... I'm off to make some spicy tofu dip!!

A Vision Of Beauty

This morning provided me with a vision of beauty. Here are your choices as to what it was:

- choice A -

- choice B -

- OR -

- choice C -

Regarding A and B ... While totally lovely (captured by PC#3 during our GO! St. Louis weekend and just shared with me this morning, these are not the visions to which I was referring. Close, but not the answer.)

The answer is C! That is the time on the clock when I got up this morning!! Wahoo!! Never happens especially the past couple of months leading up to the big run!!

Running, especially endurance running, definitely puts a cramp in the sleeping-in desire. But, now that sleeping in has become a luxury ... and now that running has made such a positive difference in my world that giving up the sleep is worth it (woah! never thought I'd say that!) ... I appreciate this kind of morning even more!

That's about to end, though! Rest Week closes out tomorrow, and we're back to it! Great week; looking forward to lacing up the shoes!

What Goes Up Must Come Down ... Or, So They Say

If there's one thing that can be said about me, I do believe it's that I'm honest. To that end, I find it critically important that I am honest today, and that honesty comes in the form of a lingering bit of self doubt. (Who doesn't love going through that?!)

It's like this: You know I'm pondering entering another Half Marathon at the end of May. Originally, I didn't register because I wanted to see how I felt after this last one. I've never considered whether I'd truly be physically ready to do that all over again inside of two months. And, as you know, I have no desire to hurt myself. So, I've been giving myself the necessary time to find out how I feel. In other words, the original thoughts were very logical and reasonable, and I put them on the back burner to emerge when appropriate.

Well, here we are post-Half, and the thoughts of the upcoming one are forefront because I do need to make a decision pretty soon. At first, I took the logical route and simply told myself to take at least one long run, if not two, and decide what to do based on how I feel physically. This decision should not be made emotionally.

See? Emotional. That's me and my running
partner after my first 10K. I was almost in
tears of disbelief that I'd done it.

But, just like starting running in the first place, that's what's getting in the way. The emotions. And, I'm an emotional gal. And, just like when I first started out, it's not always positive. Even though I've been *very* up post-Half (and, there is no reason I shouldn't be), I've found myself grumbling.


My biggest hangup? Reading too much. Reading too much about what other people are doing. Reading too much about others' goals and accomplishments that don't even apply to my life but feeling like they somehow should. Hearing those "tapes in my head" (which should be long gone seeing as we're in a digital world ... just sayin' ...) from those who don't understand why anyone would enter a run "just" to run because if you're going to enter, you should do so to win or improve your time or, or, or ... but it seems it's hardly ever to "just run".

First official run. First goal: Finish.

Just finish. That, my friends, is a very

sustainable goal! And, I like it.

And, you know what's most ridiculous about what is going through my head? Not one ... not one ... of those voices or philosophies or plans come from myself or from anyone whose opinion I would ask. I'm just surfing the web and reading. These are strangers who appear to have a lot more time invested and available to put into this effort. I could be wrong, and what others do with their time makes no difference to me. At the very least, there truly is definitely a difference in running priorities (my "just finish" and another's must-always-have-a-personal-best outcome are very, very different).

I managed to allow myself to get sucked in for a bit to where I was comparing myself to someone else when that comparison was the ol' apple-to-an-orange issue (I'll be the orange; they're yummier). For as positive and very up as I've been since crossing my first Half finish line in 2010, I have to admit that even I sometimes get sucked in to the negative spiral of realizing I'm not going to do what "they" are doing, so I must not be as good/why am I doing this blah blah blah ...

Yup, even I get sucked in.

What is this jibber jabber about speed?
Let's just go, mommy! Works for me!

Fortunately, I have learned over the years how to get out of it. Quickly. To do that, I simply compare myself with myself. Sounds weird, I know, but it works. I think about where I started. I fully embrace what I used to not be able to do. I think about every little goal I made along the way, and I remember what it took to reach them. I think about whose support I've sought and how I've filtered unsolicited opinions. I look at Elly and her approving eyes as she hopes for a run, fast or slow, long or short. It's her pace that originally trained me, after all. So, I remember my roots.

I remind myself that each and every run is between me and me. I thank God for the strength of mind, body and character to keep on keepin' on when I don't feel like it. And, I give thanks to those who support my goals with no questions asked. Let's start with the Pit Crew and go from there into a circle of fabulous friends.



We, the Pit Crew, believe in you. And,

as a reward, we get things like beef

sticks at your Expos. Win. Win.

These are the tapes I run through my head most of the time. And, when I lose sight of them, I take a minute and reflect. And, it works. That reflection often comes in the form of a nice, quiet run. All by myself.

Will I register for May's run? I still have to take that long run next week and see how I feel. That makes sense. It also makes sense in my world to grumble about the fact that the shirt for the event is black. (Really? Black? That's a good reason to blow off a run as far as I'm concerned. (ha!) ) But, not entering because I've decided I'm not good enough? 
That's just crazy talk.

I've now spent my time in Bummerville, and now I'm out. It was a short visit as I've learned the long ones are a huge waste of time. Run toward what intimidates you because you're running into it with (hopefully!) your biggest fan. Yourself! You can get yourself in, and you can get yourself out, and everyone else's goals, expectations and thoughts will be put where they belong (which is not on you). I just hope your shirt prize is more fabulous than black. (Black? Really?! *sigh!* Yeah, I'm still on that. But, I do love that that is becoming my biggest running problem!)